First Karate Lesson...

Today Randy gave the kids their first karate lesson. He is teaching Hallie and Ethan as well as four other children. So far they have learned two stances and two blocks and are very excited with their newfound knowledge. Of course, it's all sooooo serious, but I think they just look so cute in their gis and I couldn't resist snapping a few pictures. Shhh....

The Door is Never Closed

I cannot express how much God is blessing me through this book…

“Why is it such good news? I never need to fear and say, "Oh, I dare not go to God, because I just told a lie. I just lost my temper. I just deceived that person. Oh, I have no right to ask God to help me now because I failed in that task." If my righteousness comes by my works, then Satan can bar the door to God practically all the time, because I am never doing as much as I feel I should. I am never as good as I know I ought to be. I haven't achieved my super-ego. I haven't lived up to my own standards of what I feel is right. Because I have failed to achieve those ideal standards, Satan will use my failure to keep me from coming to God. "You have no right to ask God to help you when you have just failed Him again. You know your action is displeasing to God, yet you did it anyhow. Now you're in trouble and now you want God to help you. You think He is going to listen to you? No way!"
Satan can always bar the door to God if he can cause me to look within myself and at myself. But if I am looking to Jesus Christ and I realize that I am accounted righteous because of my faith in Christ, Satan can never bar the door.
Certainly, I am not yet all that God wants me to be. Far from it! But thank God, I am not what I was. Even in my present state of imperfection, God looks upon me and accounts me righteous and holy. That is why I never want to be caught anywhere except in Christ Jesus. We must never see ourselves apart from Him.”

From, Why Grace Changes Everything, By Chuck Smith, http://www2.calvarychapel.com/?show=Resources.Ebooks.whygracechangeseverything

Legalism…I have been bombarded with it my entire life. Yes, I was taught about the grace of God and the plan of salvation, but so much focus was on my behavior, my actions, my SIN, that I always felt this barrier had been placed between me and my Savior. I knew that my salvation was through God’s grace and not by my actions, but knowing that and living it are two different things. I was always taught that yes, grace saved me, but after that it was up to me to live according to certain rules to stay close to God. If I failed in this (which, of course I would) God would be disgusted with me. Not that I wouldn’t still be saved, but that, like an angry person (once again, humanizing God), He just wouldn’t be on speaking terms with me. This set me up for complete failure and alienation from the thing I need more than anything else…communication with God. Would He really do this? Save me and then withhold His companionship because I misbehaved? Of course not, but that is what I believed. I believed that His grace was only good enough to get me through the gates of Heaven. To be close to Him and receive His blessings, I had to live up to a standard of righteousness. But it is through GRACE that we are saved AND that we commune with God. He looks on us as pure and on our faith as sufficient. The door is never closed, no matter what we struggle with, if our faith is in Him. If I can accept this, I know peace will be mine and Satan can no longer prevent me from going to our Lord for any reason at any time. Who knows what God can do with me if I make myself available?
Seeing myself apart from God, even as a Christian, was self-inflicted punishment for my inability to be perfect…a punishment that goes against the very essence of salvation. God saved us because He wanted to be close to us, not so that we could spend the rest of our lives trying and failing to earn what we can never deserve. We must never draw that line between ourselves and our Savior. It is a line Satan will dance upon.

Weekend

For those of you who are wondering, I am still here. It's been a strange weekend. The kids are visiting their grandparents and Randy and I have been doing some spring cleaning, i.e. clearing out closets for a massive transport of stuff to the Salvation Army. Since we are having our interior painted in a few weeks, we really needed to reduce the amount of "stuff" or "crap", however you want to say it, in our house. Seriously, I had no idea the amount of things we own that we do not need in any form. I found my prom dress hanging in my closet. My prom dress, people. That was over ten years ago. What was I saving that for? Did I think I might throw that on and wear it out to dinner some time? Then there's the maternity clothes. Note to self: hubby had a vasectomy 3 years ago. I think we can safely say there will not be a need for those any more. I also found several other useless items: a busted VCR, half a package of newborn diapers, a half eaten box of valentine candy, a couple of old purses with pieces of petrified chewing gum inside, and several flip-flops without a match. Of course, that was just my side of the closet. Randy found all kinds of fun items, including some very "groovy" items of clothing. Needless to say, this project was way overdue.

It was really weird not having the kids around. Not only did I miss them, but I kept feeling like I left them some where. We'd be in the car and I'd turn around and panic for a second because they weren't there. I turned the monitor on at night and each morning I woke up thinking, man, they sure are being quiet. I know we needed this weekend, but I can't help but feel a little empty. I have never been away from them for more than a couple of days and even that feels like a long time. On a happier note, have any of you ever seen the movie Napolean Dynamite? Okay, this is the funniest movie I have ever seen. I have never laughed so hard in my life. I mean, this movie is genius. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it, but only if you ever had a Trapper Keeper, played tetherball, drew unicorns or ran for class president. If you didn't, this humor may be over your head.